Reply: A lesbian misstep

I will confess to this, it sent my life path in a totally different direction. I'm a 36 year old lesbian with a five year old daughter. I can assure you, I had no plans for a child. I was on a flight with my job to Toronto. My company is in Advertising and I am an illustrator. It was 2021, right after the pandemic. There were still overhangs and people were sceptic. I was. My love life was in ruins, my partner of four years had left me. I was still processing the situation, I hadn't had a partner since she left me. On the plane sitting beside me was a man who would not stop talking. I did my best but he insisted, and he kept touching my arm or my hand when he talked to me. To make matters worse he was staying at the same hotel I was. 

To bring the conversation to an end, I said softly. He should know that I was a confirmed lesbian.  The one word answer from him was "nonsense".  I got the story of his cousin, who was lesbian, and how bad her life was. She had this military woman as a partner, and that woman was unbearable. They had grown up together and when she was in college she told him she was lesbian he literally threw up on her. He knew about 
"lesbians" and it was a terrible idea.

After collecting my bags he came up to me and insisted I share the car with him.  I mean like he took my bag and I had to follow him.  In the car he put his hand on my thigh and didn't remove it. He said he wanted my company.  It's not that he rubbed my thigh, it's where he had his hand and I kept both of my hands on his to keep him from going higher. In the hotel at the counter he told me, no asking, not a question, he told me I was staying with him. He told the clerk that he and his 'wife' wanted a suite with a king sized bed and a sitting room. He got two keys and we followed the bellman up to 'our' room. In the room, I was standing in disbelief that I was there, he told me he expected me to show him respect and be soft and cuddly. 

We went down to dinner and after dinner had a drink in the bar. We then went back to 'our' room.  By then I was resigned to it. Let him do what he wanted, it would be an experience. I couldn't walk away from him and he had power over me. He wanted soft and cuddly, lots of kissing and touching, he massaged me in the way that brings about an orgasm. The first orgasm not self induced in over a year. It hurt, and my toes cramped, and he kept kissing my lips and holding his hand on my chest. He slowly opened my legs again and 'mounted'. I told him that I had never had sex with a man and to please go easy. His insertion, penetration, caught me by surprise and I whimpered, I closed my eyes trying to think of a nice place. His movements kept distracting me and he said he was done and he was going to finish inside me, because I needed to have a woman experience.

For two days in Toronto he led me around like a puppy. He had sex with me a 'few' more times, before announcing that he was taking me back with him. After returning to Atlanta he went with me to my apartment. It was a mess and I apologized and felt embarrassed. He told me to pick up and make sure the place was presentable. He put his bag in my bedroom. Now lay back, he told me, I want complete surrender. In my room he had sex with me.

The result is my daughter, I am married to him, but we don't live together. We have a father daughter relationship. I don't see anyone, I can't. I've tried. I can't, he has power over me. Once in a while, a little more often than I want, he insists on me laying back and surrendering to him.  I do. I don't kid myself. Why or how or whatever, he has total power over me. My wedding gift is my daughter.