I was about 5. An older boy from the neighborhood said I could play with him. I thought it would be fun to play with a bigger boy. He had me play with my little dick... to rub it and try to make it bigger. I had a little success, but then I saw that he had a big erection, the first I'd ever seen. He showed it to me up close while he jacked off. It was fascinating. But when his rubbing became vigorous and he ejaculated, I was shocked, scared, and interested all at the same time. We made a secret appointment for later. The fascination made me go. He showed up with an older boy and they forced me into a sheltered area and pulled out their cocks. They tried to get me to suck his friend, but I resisted and they just rubbed my face in his crotch while he masturbated. When he stepped aside and got off, I thought they might let me go. But I turned around and the first boy was facing me with a full erection. I was afraid they might kill me or something if I didn't cooperate, plus I was fascinated by his cock. He made me lick the sides. Then when I resisted his order to suck the head, he forced it between my lips. There was a big drop of precum on it which made it slide into my mouth. The precum actually tasted OK. Then it became a game of trying to get the big cockhead into my mouth. Eventually, I noticed the taste of the precum changed to a much more pungent flavor. Then he came down my throat. I spit it out and wiped my mouth while I was crying. I was mad that he came in my mouth. They let me go as they laughed at me and told me I had to keep it secret or bad things would happen. In later years, I developed a fascination with sucking cock and eventually began doing so, often at glory-holes. I had the idea, or feeling, that if I had swallowed the boy's load, everything would have been better. Swallowing cum became a fantasy of mine that was often fulfilled. I have always wanted intimacy with women, and performing oral on them was my main focus. I eventually married, but still have a longing to swallow cum.
