I have always been a bit shy and found it difficult to make a conversation with someone I didn't know, so when I turned 18 and went out drinking with some for friends for the first time I was extremely nervous. First drinks were ordered and I noticed a guy at the counter staring at me he was cute but a bit old for me around 30, the drinks had been coming quick and I was a bit tipsy when he came over and offered me a drink with a alcohol in my system I had this new found confidence. We started chatting and drinking together, before I knew what was happening i was all over him kissing, touching,rubbing doing things I'd never done before. He had me against the wall tounge down my throat his hand deep inside my pants when he whispered in my ear "do you want to come back to my place?" By now I way past drunk and could barley walk straight but still said yes. We stumbled outside into a taxi where we went to some place I assume was his. We got inside he led me into a bedroom where he kissed me and started to take my top off too drunk and unable to stand I fell down on to the bed he knelt down and removed my shoes. I lent forward to kiss him but instead I passed out. What happened after this is really a blur and I don't know the full story, but I do remember coming in and out of conciseness a light above in my eyes and blurred faces lots more then this one face I saw before passing out. I can remember feeling multiple hands all over my body at the same time, being pushed, dragged moved and thrown around the bed. Trying to say no,stop but not a sound come out. Then nothing I have no other recollection of what happened until I woke many hours later, I was naked and in bed with the guy from the pub he was naked too but I don't remember removing clothes when I passed out I still had my jeans and bra on. Quietly and quickly got out the bed gathered up my clothes and snuck out getting dressed as fast as I could without my knickers that were nowhere to be seen I ran down the road I called a taxi and went home. As soon as I was back home I stripped off feeling dirty I hoped in the shower. One of the biggest mysteries to me was what I found when I got out, I was drying myself in front of the mirror I turned to grab some clothes when I got glimpse of my back. It was covered in hickeys love bites whatever you wish to call this them there was atleast a dozen all different shapes sizes and colours. Was each hickey a mark left by a different guy? Was this how many guys were there doing gods knows what to me while I was passed out?
I don't think you could say I was raped I went home willing with this 1 guy knowing he wanted to have sex with me but I do feel as everyone else took advantage of me safe to say I don't drink out anymore.
